There are many scenes that fall into the cliché, or what I call, the Readers Digest category because writers like to pretend they are evolved people who can rise above it all and see the profound meaning of life. I’d like to give an example of one of these and then the more realistic view. I invite you to post a pair of your own.
Readers Digest Scene
~My husband squeezed my hand to encourage me in that last half hour of that glorious first childbirth. He looked like an angel in his blue gown, gazing at me with pure love in his brimming eyes. I rallied and pushed with all my might, just like the doctor told me to. It hurt, oh yes, it hurt, but they were pains of joy since I knew what came at the end. “I can do this,” I told my husband. “Just hold my hand.”
What Really Happened
~I yanked my hand away from my husband’s grasp. “You’re hurting my hand!” I screamed at him. “Why don’t you climb up here and try to squeeze this boulder through your tenderest place?!”
He licked his lips, mouth opening and closing, but no words came out. He looked like a demented guppie, and WHAT USE WAS THAT AT A TIME LIKE THIS!
“On the next contraction, I want you to push as hard as you can,” the doctor said. This was the guy who had a statue on his desk of a gowned physician holding a newborn upside down by the feet. Sadist. No wonder he had his face covered. He was probably smiling behind that mask or checking his cell phone beneath the sheet covering my knees.
Shit. Here come the torture bands of pressure on my poor sore gut again.
“AAAAAaaaaaaUUUUUuuuuuGGGGGhhhhhh!” I pushed with all my might.
“AAAAAaaaaaaUUUUUuuuuuGGGGGhhhhhh OW!” Okay, I’m done here. I’ve had it. Nope, I cannot do this. I’m outta here.
“I see the baby’s head.”
A baby’s head? Oh. Oh! Okay. I agree to stay for one more round. Well, maybe two. But that’s it.