We all have them—times when we’re not writing as much as we’d like. I’m having one now. It’s not that I’m not writing for hours a day; teaching writing classes online is very fulfilling in terms of capturing what I mean in words. But what about MY stuff? Why is it on the back burner? How come I’m not writing in this blog—a happy refuge where I’ve spent some fine hours reading and writing?
Let me speculate a bit. Is this writers block? No. In fact I don’t really believe in writers block. I do believe in the deadening power of self-doubt, but that’s not my particular problem at present. Been there, done that, got the tee shirt, but I gave it to Goodwill.
Is this avoidance? Am I fearful of something and eager to avoid making an appearance? Nope. As always I’m happy to write poorly, make a mess, and have fun clicking away at the keyboard.
How about a dull streak? This sounds closer. Is my emotional, physical, and creative energy going elsewhere? Am I left feeling too dull to come up with ideas? Am I too tired to participate? Maybe. But what really annoys me is that I have a suspicion that a dull streak is another name for pouting. Things are not going well. I’m mad. So I won’t write.
Ah, what fools we be. And so I write this entry to face the music, to use my favorite tool of writing to challenge my pouting, annoyed, struggling self to remember that, yes, this is where I find the energy and strength I need to get on with it.
What stops you? I’d sure like to hear I’m not alone.